The Ramblings of a Maniac
(I warned you Yellow Dog was Manic)
notice how the words "Maniac" and "Manic" are sooo close?

SOME OF THIS STUFF DOESN'T EVEN MAKE SENSE, BUT YOU'RE HERE, AREN'T YOU?


Dog without fear 
sits on a red ship. 
All is quiet. 
No one is old 
all are young. 
It is not your exit into reality.
Random thoughts... 

Under a rail of black in tender bridges. 

To lit is Red. 

A Branch near you. 

Love  can't die when it never lived.

Live
On
As one
Never
Sees
 
Try to reframe from dying
Until life detains you from lying.
Love is a way to fight hate
Without killing the one that touches you.
Murphy's Rules of Combat (sent to me by my brother Fred)
1 ) If the enemy is in range, so are you.
2 ) Incoming fire has the right of way.
3 ) Don't look conspicuous: it draws fire.
4 ) The easy way is always mined.
5 ) Try to look unimportant, they may be low on ammo.
6 ) Professionals are predictable, it's the amateurs that are dangerous.
7 ) The enemy invariably attacks on one of two occasions:
     * When you're ready for them.
     * When you're not ready for them.
8 ) Teamwork is essential; it gives the enemy someone else to shoot at.
9 ) If you can't remember, the Claymore is pointed at you.
10 ) If your attack is going well, you have walked into an ambush.
11 ) Don't draw fire, it irritates the people around you.
12 ) The only thing more accurate than incoming enemy fire is incoming
friendly fire.
13 ) When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend.
14 ) If it's stupid but works, it isn't stupid.
15 ) When in doubt empty the magazine.
16 ) Never share a fox hole with anyone braver than you.
17 ) Anything you do can get you shot. Including doing nothing.
18 ) Make it too tough for the enemy to get in and you can't get out.
19 ) Mines are equal opportunity weapons.
20 ) A Purple Heart just proves that were you smart enough to think of a
plan, stupid enough to try it, and lucky enough to survive.
21 ) Don't ever be the first, don't ever be the last and don't ever
volunteer to do anything.
22 ) The quartermaster has only two sizes: too large and too small.
23 ) Five second fuses only last three seconds.
 
A Few Points to Ponder
By Yellow Dog's favorite comedian, these are:
Quotes from George Carlin (a fellow maniac) 
   1. Don't sweat the petty things and don't pet  the sweaty things. 
    
2. One tequila, two tequila, three tequila, floor. 
    
3. Atheism is a non-prophet organization. 
    
4. If man evolved from monkeys and apes, why do we still have monkeys and apes? 
    
5. The main reason Santa is so jolly is because he knows where all the bad girls live. 
    
6. I went to a bookstore and asked the saleswoman, "Where's the self-help section?" She said if she told me, it 
  would defeat the purpose. 
    
7. Could it be that all those trick-or-treaters wearing sheets aren't going as ghosts but as mattresses? 
    
8. If a mute swears, does his mother wash his hands with soap? 
    
9. If a man is standing in the middle of the forest speaking and there is no woman around to hear him...is he still wrong? 
    
10. If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation? 
    
11. Is there another word for synonym? 
    
12. Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice?" 
    
13. Where do forest rangers go to "get away from  it all?" 
    
14. What do you do when you see an endangered animal eating an  endangered plant? 
    
15. If a parsley farmer is sued, can they garnish his wages? 
    
16. Would a fly without wings be called a walk? 
    
17. Why do they lock gas station bathrooms? Are they afraid someone will clean them? 
    
18. If a turtle doesn't have a shell, is he homeless or naked? 
    
19. Why don't sheep shrink when it rains? 
    
20. Can vegetarians eat animal crackers? 
    
21. If the police arrest a mime, do they tell him he has the right to remain silent? 
    
22. Why do they put Braille on the drive-through bank machines? 
    
23. How do blind people know when they are done wiping? 
    
24. How do they get the deer to cross at that yellow road sign? 
    
25. Is it true that cannibals don't eat clowns because they taste  funny? 
 
26. What was the best thing before sliced bread? 
    
27. One nice thing about egotists: they don't talk about other people. 
    
28. To be intoxicated is to feel sophisticated, but not be able to say it. 
    
29. Never underestimate the power of stupid people in large groups. 
    
30. The older you get, the better you realize you were. 
    
31. Age is a very high price to pay for maturity. 
    
32. Procrastination is the art of keeping up with yesterday. 
    
33. Women like silent men, they think they're listening. 
    
34. Men are from Earth, women are from Earth. Deal with it. 
    
35. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day. 
    
36. Do pediatricians play miniature golf on Wednesdays? 
    
37. Before they invented drawing boards, what did they go back to? 
    
38. Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? 
    
39. If all the world is a stage, where is the audience sitting? 
    
40. If God dropped acid, would he see people? 
    
41. If one synchronized swimmer drowns, do the rest have to drown too? 
    
42. If the #2 pencil is the most popular, why is it still #2? 
    
43. If work is so terrific, how come they have to pay you to do it? 
    
44. If you ate pasta and antipasta, would you still be hungry? 
    
45. If you try to fail, and succeed, which have you done? 
    
46. Why is it called tourist season if we can't shoot at them? 

    

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